What Is Family, The World, 33%

Edit: When I wrote this, I was really hurt and angry. I have since re-edited it and taken out some of the pain and some of the cutting remarks, because they were unfair.

Okay, so... in coming out to people close to me, I've run into a number that really surprised me: 33%. What this means is that 33% were okay with it. I'm not talking about my immediate family, my ex, or my kids. They 100% support, love, and accept me. I'm talking about people in a broader circle.

What about the other 67%? I was really hoping for something more loving, a response like:

"Okay... this is new, but I love you, I see you, and I support you."

Instead, I got the same old tired lines: bathroom fear, sports fear, "men aren't women and women aren't men" (the binary), and "my religion says love thy neighbor, but this changes everything." And I got more shit like "I'm not convinced." That's the worst one, by the way. It suggests I have to convince them, or prove myself to them, or get their approval before I can exist. WTF.

So there it is. 33%.

And... I would rather be alone than have people in my life who say one thing to my face and think another.

Kurt Cobain said:

"I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not."

That's exactly where I stand too.

Crazy... dogs, cats, elephants, animals can love unconditionally, but humans? No. We are @#%@% up. We pick a political team, follow an imaginary god, and die on that hill. Rigid, messy, uncompromising, thinking we have a say in how each of us lives. Dangerous animals.

There is a saying: "Blood is thicker than water." I started digging into this. Is it? Is it? I put that to the test when I transitioned. I found that outside relationships can be complicated and difficult. Maybe the people I reached out to just aren't ready for the truth of things, the nature of things.

So... I found this quote:

"The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb."

It suggests that the relationships you choose, like friendships or chosen family, are more sacred than the relationships you are simply born into. This is the real truth. I raised three boys. I care about all three of them. They ARE brothers, and I am their parent, no matter what my gender expression is. I raised them, I love them, and I would do anything for them, and I have, repeatedly.

So yeah... people who are hung up on fear and drinking the half-truths of the now-fascist right-wing media, or the RWCN "one religion to rule them all" ideology, can go F themselves.

33% is just a number. It's not permanent, and it can change. People can change, and people do.